Remembering Maria, Chris' mother, who passed away 10 years ago today. It is still so sad that she is not with us, but I feel very lucky to have known her and to have felt her support and love for as long as I did.
Giving myself a half an hour's treat: reading the first chapter of Kazuo Ishiguro's Buried Giant this morning while finishing my coffee in a quiet house.
Enjoying egg-lemon soup at lunch-time. A student and I made it yesterday for a potluck, and we split the left-overs. I hope she enjoyed her left-overs today, too.
Trying to forge ahead through some serious tiredness by going to the walking track. I am grateful to the audiobook of The Night Gardener for giving me some momentum and keeping me going as I walked.
Writing postcards to Chris' family. I want to be better about sending Chris' father, uncle, and aunts postcards each month this year.
Making some brain-space for myself by tidying my home office. It's far from truly tidy (will that ever be achieved?) but I feel like I could think in my room again. This is important because I'm heading into crunch-time for a paper due in a little under 3 weeks.
Finding this quotation from Gloria Steinhem on the Facebook feed for Lapham's Quarterly today (in honor of International Women's Day, I think): "...a rejection of the way a woman speaks is often a way of blaming or
dismissing her without dealing with the content of what she is saying." Obviously such a state of affairs is not a good thing, but this quotation resonates with some things I was facing last year at this same time and I take comfort and strength in it. Such criticisms are made to feel personally shaming to individual women, and it is (sadly) empowering to realize that they are a general strategy--it helps, even at the distance of a year, to wash off some of the shame and to be ready, the next time it happens, to call people on it yet again.
3/5: snow day & a surprise
School was cancelled, so I got to sleep in and then catch up on some work (mostly emails that I had been avoiding for no good reason) while weaving in some time with Chris and some time outdoors.
And this evening I found out that part of a letter I had written to National Public Radio had been read on the air this afternoon. Some far-flung friends and colleagues heard it and wrote me quick emails to let me know--it was nice to have an occasion to touch base with them.
And this evening I found out that part of a letter I had written to National Public Radio had been read on the air this afternoon. Some far-flung friends and colleagues heard it and wrote me quick emails to let me know--it was nice to have an occasion to touch base with them.
3/3: before
I went to a lecture this evening for which I had higher hopes than were borne out by the talk itself. But as I was waiting for the talk to begin I read a very short short-story, "Argos" by Joy Williams, and it was unexpectedly touching. If I hadn't gone to the talk I wouldn't have had those random minutes before it started to read something on a lark and discover something that will stay with me.
3/2: morning, afternoon, evening
Morning: Getting to school very early so I could prepare for classes in a calm and quiet way.
Afternoon: Finding a handful of postcards waiting for me in my in-town mailbox.
Evening: Managing to grocer and do tomorrow's reading before my normal time to close up shop.
Afternoon: Finding a handful of postcards waiting for me in my in-town mailbox.
Evening: Managing to grocer and do tomorrow's reading before my normal time to close up shop.
3/1: opening paragraph
This afternoon I wrote the first paragraph of a paper I'll be giving later this month. I'm nervous about finding time to finish both researching and writing it, but it felt good to begin to put words down, to realize that I have words to put down.
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